Today, I will communicate clearly and directly in my conversations with others. I will strive to avoid manipulative, indirect, or guilt-producing statements. I can be tactful and gentle whenever possible. And I can be assertive if necessary.

The Language of Letting Go

Mind f*cked is the only term I can use to describe what voldy did to me. (Well, technically I can also say soul-murdering, but that’s a whole different story).

I am so thankful that I am no longer in a relationship where communication was always in the form of one (or more) of the following:

  • Circular arguments (yup, round and around we went)
  • Diverting the conversation (funny how in hindsight I realise that the conversation seemed to go onto other topics as soon as he wasn’t getting his way/he was being proved wrong)
  • Straight up denial
  • Blaming me (because everything was always my fault)
  • Belittling my needs (whilst making out that I was this insufferable demanding woman)
  • Ridiculing me
  • Manipulative statements
  • THE SILENT TREATMENT (for no apparent reason)
  • Making me feel guilty for speaking up
  • Many others…

It’s refreshing to (finally) be able to communicate with people without expecting these tactics. I can disagree, I can draw my boundaries and I can freely express myself without fear of the consequences.

“Why do you blog?” He asked.

After some thought, I replied “because I’m so used to being silenced and now I have a voice”.