Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
Beautiful words, and an apt description of the work that I’m currently doing. Ironically, I was discussing this with my doctor yesterday. I approached the subject of my very unhealthy deifying of a man, who inevitably doesn’t live up to my unrealistic expectations and eventually ends in heartbreak (for me). Add to that it’s a major trigger, and all in all it’s just not a very good idea.
How does one go about finding all the barriers within oneself? My approach is to reflect on past behaviour and pay attention to current behaviour – in time, patterns will emerge and they’re a great indication of what’s going on inside my mind – and heart. So far it’s been working and I’m making ample progress.
As for “your task is not to seek for love”, it’s a lot easier to say than do. When you’ve been sociologically programmed to think that the ultimate goal in life is to find a “suitable life partner”, it’s very hard to change your entire dogma. I’m a firm believer that when you stop seeking love, it will find you. The expectation and hope of the relationship working out is ultimately what causes it to fail.
So, my friends, I vow that from now on, there will be no more anticipation for Prince Charming to come along and reunite me with my other shoe. Should I lose a glass slipper, I’ll go out and buy another pair.
Preferably Louboutin.
It’s depressing to speak to another woman who has been burnt as much as I have. Perhaps, upon reflection, she was treated worse. It’s sad to acknowledge the world that we live in is full of good people who suffer. We discussed the repercussions of our experiences and, although I try to think of the positives – the growth, understanding and wisdom that I have gained – I can never lose sight of the pain that I have endured. I wonder, was it worth it? No, it wasn’t. I was happily stumbling through life none the wiser of such vile villainy. And I was doing quite alright.
